Thursday, January 25, 2007

Let’s Be Religious: Biblical Perspectives On…II

New The MinusCar Project Policy: no more patch kits. Full tube only. Patch kits useless below x degrees.

New The MinusCar Project Knowledge: That burning sensation is your rapidly decompressing CO2 cartridge freezing the end of your finger.

Official The MinusCar Project Cab Driver: All City Cab (555-1234) (bet 554-1234 gets tired of people like me) and ask for the driver they call, "Hot Rod." I think I was charged by the word. Awesome...if you like that sort of thing.


Transportation

Lots of cyclists seem to understand the world looks different from the seat of a bicycle. For evidence of this claim look no further than the photos of Oil Is For Sissies or Simple Perspectives. (OIFS probably never thought he’d be included in a “biblical perspectives on…” sort of post. Sorry to do this to you Jim.)

For a while I’ve suspected that the world looks different from inside a bus.

Check this out, Jonah changed his mind and agreed to go to Nineveh. Apparently the world looks different from the inside of a fish.

Maybe transportation matters.

I wonder what Jonah thought about while he was riding around in the belly of a fish. I bet it was something along these lines: “Those who cling to worthless idols forfeit the grace that could be theirs. But I, with a song of thanksgiving, will sacrifice to you.”

Boy I could have some fun with that “worthless idol” thing. American Idol anyone? Sheesh, this stuff writes itself!

The thing about the bible is it sounds really judgmental when it’s quoted about other people. Other's say it’s like a double edged sword. Jonah chapter 2 contains the rest of what he thought about.

I want to have more fun with idols: Cars. Abortion legislation. Marriage protection acts. Family Values. Yep. It’s easy to talk about those people in those SUV’s at that church. Even I can do that.

What about these worthless idols: Zaskar, Timberline, 800SL, R1000Si, a yet to be named Independent Fabrication?

Damn. (literally)

I can be rougher. The MinusCar Project itself. Ugh, please stop.

Or what about, gasp: The Boy 8 and The Boy 4. Family values indeed. Adam and Able? How about Abraham and Isaac? God and Jesus. This is getting scary. Surely I’m way off base somewhere. Maybe I should have gotten this post peer reviewed.

I’ll ride the bus tomorrow and see if I can figure out the “song of thanksgiving” and “sacrificing to you” parts.

I wonder if I could be like Jonah?

(…to be continued…)

Seemingly useless statements:

I did not attend when Al Gore was in Sioux Falls speaking at the Augustana College Boe Forum.

I have not seen An Inconvenient Truth.

I did not read the report in the local daily "Gore: Global warming 'could literally end all human civilization'" because the headline itself turns me upside down.

1 comment:

Jim said...

Something funny going on here...that lightning seems to be getting awfully close to my house...