Give My Regards To Your Grandmother

5/18 update - I happened by this intersection yesterday. There is no sidewalk - a clear indication that our DJ friend Andy has a different set of issues that he's transferred to a battle between his 4,000lb vehicle and a someone else's 10lb vehicle. I hope you get those fixed soon Andy.

In case it matters - I think it sounds like the cyclist failed to perform the legally required yield when riding a bike in a crosswalk. Of course I find the rest of the language disturbing.

Andy - radio DJ @ HOT 104.7 - words spoken on the morning show, May 15. Download mp3 from this page.

I'm getting up on my soapbox...

I'm going to torque off a couple people here but I really don't care. Here's the thing. It's just one of these, 'I think somethings dumb, other people think it's awesome.' One of those things. The only difference is I'm on the radio so I get to tell the world about it and they get to call and yell at me.

Yesterday I'm driving home from work. Pull off the interstate off I-229 at Cliff to turn right. I get to the bottom, it's a red light...

6:30, sunny day, nice day.

There's a little bit of traffic left over from rush hour coming down Cliff and I'm just waiting for my opportunity to turn right at the red light and a Lance Armstrong wannabe, wearing a yellow jersey and biker shorts and a helmet with one of those little doctor things that hangs down...a mirror.

Back when I was 12 and rode a bicycle I would just look back, but anyway.

This guy crosses the street in front of me. I have no problem with that, he's trying to get to the bike trail. Instead of getting up on the curb, you know, OUT OF THE STREET...you know, when I was 12 my mom told me don't play in the street. Instead of doing that, he camps out in the middle of my turning path. Waiting to cross Cliff Ave to get over the bike path.

And I was losing my mind. Now granted this is a small thing to be upset about. BUT STILL, I'm driving a 4,000lb car, you're riding a 10lb bicycle. Get OUT OF THE STREET.

I guess there's some law in Sioux Falls that you can't ride on the sidewalk. I didn't know that before and someone called an yelled at me last time I complained about bicyclists but at least keep up with traffic.

...

So this guy is just sitting there and I am staring at him waiting for him to look. He didn't have enough time because he doesn't have an engine - to cross the street. I, have a motor and can turn into the right lane. The problem is all the traffic coming from the north on Cliff is all in the left lane. So I could have turned right into the right lane as soon as I got there. But this clown is camped out right in my way. If I had gone I would have hit him. Well, I'm not going to get a ticket for vehicular manslaughter or getting 50 points for smoking a bicyclist. But still, if you're waiting to cross the street I think you're allowed to be up on the curb with your bicycle.

Ok, and I'm not, I know this is like bicycle town USA in the summer with our 800 miles of bike paths that's fine. Tomorrow is ride your bike to work day which I'm going to do but mines going to have a motor. Yeah, I'm riding my bike to work. It's still better mileage than a car.

All I'm asking bicycle guy in your pretty tight shorts, showing me every curve of your butt...I was only staring at is because I was like "if I had a bee bee gun right now, he would be yelping and calling the cops."

...

Call #1:

But they're not a car. That's my problem. They're like my grandma in a car. That's what bugs me. Bicyclists are like old people driving cars. Either throw a motor on that pedal-bicycle, yeah they're not a pedestrian, but yet they are riding a pedal-bike. They're using their feet, which I believe is where the ped comes from. That's why you go to a podiatrist when you got a bad foot. You're a pedestrian not a car.

When they're going down the street and they're keeping up I have no problem with them. But when they're going slow in front of me and making me...that was all he had to do was get up on the curb, get out of the way and let me turn. If it would have been a car in front of me well then I'm just screwed.